It’s 5:18 pm PST on Christmas Eve 2012, and I am in a horrible panic. The year is just about over! Where did it go? How did it get so late so soon, to paraphrase Dr. Seuss? Man, this year has flown by, breaking the sound barrier and all other time/space limitations!
I’m looking back, only long enough to learn the lessons of 2012, before saying my goodbyes to a dreary and difficult year. I’m looking back and I see how I’ve lost my balance again. I’m looking back and I see what I want to change and work on moving forward. And I’m looking back, and I’m wishing on the stars that what’s in front of me is a heck of lot better than what I’ve been through in the last 365 days. And I’m making plans, dreaming of happier times and divising lots and lots of New Year’s resolutions.
I’m resolving to finally give my writing a chance and let it be all I know it can be. I’m resolving to let my inner artist out to play as often as possible. I’m resolving to dance, doodle and draw. I’m resolving to collage, scarpbook and create. I’m resolving to get over my “what if I suck” disease and sign up for a creative writing class, like I’ve been dreaming of for three solid years now. I’m resolving to get over my perfectionist and critical self in order to take French lessons, because I want so badly to be a full-fledged Francophile. I’m resolving to leave those who’ve moved on behind and focus on those whose love, friendship and support I’ve always had, including myself. I’m resolving to be more French, wear more scarves and let my inner Europhile gleefully take over my life. I’m resolving to stay strong, remain tough and never give up. I’m resovling to wear red lipstick and fishnet stockings more often. I’m resolving to laugh often, grow stronger and live the colorful and juicy life I am destined to live. I’m resolving to savor the good, spit out the bad and drink in every last bit of joie de vivre I can get my hands on. In other words and simply put, I’m resolving to evolve.
It’s now 5:36 pm PST on Christmas Eve 2012, and I’m not longer feeling panicky about the end of year fastly aproaching. I know what I’ve been through, what I’ve endured, where I am going, and what I am going to do. I am going to keep evolving. Can there be anything more wonderful and exciting than that?
Merry Christmas and Happy New Year.